Meaning-Making #24 — ❓ How to ask better questions (that help you get the outcomes you want in life).

written by JIBRAN EL BAZI |

Hey friends,

So there's this phrase that I have heard Shane Parrish say a few times on his podcast: "Outcome over Ego"

Outcome over ego

He says that you shouldn't let your ego decide the outcome of something just because your ego wants to feel better, correct, or in the right.

I agree that it's in situations where you regard the outcome as more important than your ego where you'll make a real positive impact.

But how can you actively practice this? By asking yourself questions.

The right questions.

Asking better questions of yourself — and then answering them truthfully — will net you better answers.

Those answers, in turn, will help you make better decisions and take better actions.

Actions that serve the outcome you really want, vs. the outcome your ego may wish.

But as you can imagine, asking and answering questions truthfully means you have to leave your ego at the door.

That's not an easy choice, by any means. But it is the right choice.

There are some tools and practices that can help you with that, of course — meditation, coaching, conversation, psychedelics, or walking around in nature, to name just a few.

For now, I have this shortlist for you with a few questions to get you started (hopefully, it'll help you achieve some great outcomes as a result! 😉):

  • "Who do you want to share this life with?" - Visakan
  • "What would you do if fear was not a factor and you could not fail?" - Annette
  • "Are my actions guided by love, or by fear?" - Luminita
  • "Who do you want to serve (in this life, in your business)?" - Jibran

More from Shane Parrish on Asking Questions

To stick with Shane Parrish for a bit... he also has two great pieces of content about asking better questions on his website:

#1 Here's an excerpt from his article "The Power of Questions."

  • Good questions are the key to better insights.
  • Questions allow you to assess your understanding as well as others. Identifying gaps in your knowledge is the first step to filling them.
  • We can learn a lot, often more, from the work involved in answering a question than from the answer itself.

#2 And here is what you can learn from a podcast episode where Shane interviews Warren Berger on how to "Improve Your Life by Improving Your Questions":

  • How Warren manages the constant input and stimulation from online consumption when it's time to create.
  • The small habits that pack the biggest punch and make the most difference in Warren's life
  • What makes a question more or less effective
  • And more...

That's it for this week!

I wish you some contemplative time away from a screen, preferably in nature, where you can ask yourself some important questions .



Thanks for reading. You can get more actionable ideas in my newsletter.
Every other week, I share at least 3 short & interesting bits that help you live an intentional and purposeful life. Over 200 people subscribe. Enter your email now and join.

Almost done!
Please check your inbox for a welcome email and click 'Confirm your subscription.'
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.

About jibran el bazi

Hey I'm Jibran, I'm here to learn, to play, and to connect with other meaning-makers. I write to seek understanding and to help others to become their true selves. I often start my writing with a question in one of the below themes:

🧭 Understand yourself - "How do you find clarity on who you are and what you want out of life?"

Take charge of your life - "How do you pursue your purpose while living a balanced life?"

Pass on the torch - "How do you best help others to become their True Self?"

More NEWSLETTERS On This Topic